I've sort of hidden from myself as of late. Confrontation is not a favorite of mine. I'm not sure if that makes sense, but I've struggled to be myself. I’ve struggled to overcome my feelings of being this monster while I’m pregnant (an emotional wreck without a cause and a bit of a rage-aholic). I’ve had to depend so much on my husband and his strength.
When my tongue has been unnecessarily sharp and my tone harsh, he’s brought me back down to the level I need to be. As I’ve looked over our finances and medical bills and murmured, “how”, he has carried me with his unwaivering faith. He’s reminded me that no mistakes I’ve made in my life are too much. I can repent. I can have a clean slate, always, if I will humble myself and turn to the Savior in fervent prayer. He’s put his arms around me and told me that I’m beautiful, though I feel like a beached whale. Upon return of errands run, I’ve found the house spotlessly clean—even that he’s detail-cleaned places I have avoided for weeks. Grilled cheese sandwiches or macaroni and cheese are pleasing to him. Hearing him pray brings the spirit into our home and inspires me to be better. He’s made me laugh and smile and cackle (a lovely family trait). In situations anticipated with much anxiety, he’s been there to guide me along, to comfort, and to help bear.
Before bed last night, it occurred to me how grateful I am that Heavenly Father love(s/d) us enough to place us in family units. I’m thriving right now because of my wonderful husband. He truly is my help-meet. Yes, he’s my best friend and I’m too attracted to him and all of those things, but marriage isn’t always about the fields of flowers and the roses. Sometimes, we have to carry each other until the other can stand on his/her feet. Sometimes, we have to remind them of who they are when they’ve forgotten.
“. . . As ye are desirous to come into the fold of God, and to be called his people, and are willing to bear one another’s burdens, that they may be light;
“Yea, and are willing to mourn with those that mourn; yea, and comfort those that stand in need of comfort, and to stand as witnesses of God at all times and in all things, and in all places . . .” --Mosiah 18:8-9
4 comments:
Hey Keri! Thank you so much for the adorable little girl clothes! It was so fun to get in the mail! We really don't have much for 3-6 months so I was very happy!
Keri- Thank you for sharing your beautiful words and experiences. I whole-heartedly agree with you in that marriage isn't always about flowers and that we need to carry each other. I know that Adam has done that for me and I'm glad that Ryan is doing this for you. Hang in there sweetie! The hormones will eventually calm down.:)
Beautifully put, always true. It's nice to remember when things are hard. You will always be beautiful!
You two are so cute!! I loved what you said. Things will be great for you, those stinking hormones anyway!You are so pretty!
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