Last Sunday, Ryan and I met with our bishop to discuss some things we could do better to strengthen our family through our ongoing trials. We left his office feeling hopeful and uplifted.
As the week went on, we noticed that our trials did not go away. In fact, new ones came up this week. Thursday found us at the doctor for a referral to a pediatric urologist / surgeon to repair a hernia for Matthew, and Friday brought a car accident for Ryan. When Ryan finally arrived home that night, I asked him how he was feeling. He related the details of the accident and we both felt grateful for his safety and protection. We also felt a bit numb.
We continued to talk, and after a while, I looked over at Ryan and just said, "You know what? I just can't worry about this stuff anymore. I'm choosing faith." And that's what we've done. We don't know what will come on Monday with the police report, but we know we have acted honestly. We know that we pay our tithing, and Heavenly Father has provided a way for our family thus far. If and when Matthew has surgery, whether an actual repair or an exploratory to rule out the hernia, we know a way will be provided for us to pay for the procedure.
Tonight, I ran into our bishop at the ward fondue party. I haven't felt well all week, so it was a stretch for me to attend--especially since Ryan had his final day of this three-day tournament for softball. But . . . I needed to be around people who love me and support me. So . . . we went, and it actually went really well.
Anyway, our bishop approached me to ask about the week and if we implemented the changes in our home. I explained to him that we did, but that we experienced several new things too. "Oh, Sister Allred. There are only so many things that can go wrong. Don't worry about it. You can only go up from here. But if you work on the things we talked about, it's going to be much easier to handle those trials and you will be strengthened."
That's exactly what happened this week. Nothing was taken away; in fact, more things were added to our plate. However, our attitudes changed. Our lamps were more prepared with deeper reserves of oil. When those things happened, all we could feel was peace. All has felt still. I don't feel like I can't breathe. In fact, I feel relaxed. I know many individuals have it much harder than our family. I feel calm. I trust. I submit.
I'm grateful for the words of Christ.
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